Do you have an inside voice?  What I mean is, do you have an inner monologue voice?

I do.

And it sounds so much different than my actual verbal voice.  When I hear myself on playbacks, such as audio and video recordings (listen to me!  As if I have an endless supply of random audio recordings of myself.  Of course, I’m referring to home movies, but that doesn’t sound very glamorous, does it?) I never recognize my voice.  I hear myself talking and my inner monologue voice, the one that I am very familiar with, says to me, “Who the heck is that?  What a dumb voice! You can literally HEAR her lips twisting into a pretzel twist.  Her enunciation is SO annoying!”

I like my inner monologue voice.  She is soft spoken when necessary. Invokes passion and emotion at other times.  She makes me cry.  Her timing is impeccable, and you know those times when you wish you had thought to say THAT in THAT moment?  Yeah, she never has those.  She’s witty, and curt, and quick, and articulate.  She also knows a lot of big words which can be deleterious, but effective.

Some people have suggested that I start doing a video blog because they think it would be so FUNNY.  I conferred with my inner voice and we both agreed that wouldn’t be such a great idea because she wouldn’t be headlining the gig.  Plus, she’s usually ON FIRE while I’m doing the dishes and staring out the window (which currently gives me a lot of lookey-lou pleasure into the next building’s tenant’s lives), but she clams right up when the computer boots up.  The girl is moody.